Sunday, January 9, 2011

Classy way of getting back on the Second wife by the First wife.

On Christmas day, I was watching the 11th episode of the reality show "Raakhi Ka Insaaf"(Raakhi's Justice) on NDTV Imagine. The one that came for justice was a lady by the name of Ramsawari from Delhi whose husband SP Sharma has got 2 more wives besides her. In the show, Ramsawari was  not willing to turn her face to the other 2 wives who took away her lawful husband from her. The 2nd and 3rd wives turned out to be real sisters and distant cousins of Ramsawari herself. The guy's monthly income is only Rs.15,000/- and its a wonder how he manages his different households..all 3 wives with kids totaling to 11 in number. Everybody was in awe at this not so good-looking guy who committed bigamy. Ramsawari was full of anger and even rushed out to hit her husband's younger brother as she was unhappy with him for accepting the other two ladies in the family while she and her kids are being kept at bay.

Being a woman myself, I could understand what she must have been going through all those 15 yrs when her husband went away to those 2 other ladies. As she got children by him, she must have chosen to stay married to him for the sake of her children. Many Indian women instead of seeking the help of law and punishing their husbands who commited this crime of bigamy tend to stay in this manner.

As I watched the show, I felt like reaching out to the first wife and comforting her. Then, I recollected something I had witnessed in the past in my hometown. I remembered a clever and grand lady by the name of Sanarik, whose husband got involved with a second woman and stayed with that woman while she and her children kept waiting for him to return every single moment. It was very painful for her but she could not leave or give up on him for the sake of her children who need their father and besides, why should she give up on her man who rightfully belongs to her? So, despite being heart broken she stayed calm and instead of quarrellings with or abusing the 2nd wife, avenged her for taking her husband from her in a very classy manner.
         Sanarik was so unhappy and bugged with the way her life had been going so decided to do something to change everything. She wanted the 2nd wife to know the pain she and her children had been going through after she, the other woman got involved with him despite knowing the fact that he is a married guy with kids. She thought of a plan and finally decided to put it into action. Keeping in mind that her husband, even though middle aged has eyes for beautiful women, she realized.... What better way to divert his attention from his 2nd woman than to find another women more beautiful than her and to get her husband involved with the 3rd. For days she kept looking for a beautiful lady who would agree to marry her husband as his 3rd wife and also would understand her, remain close to her and share the joys and sorrows of life in the same house together with her and would not conflict with her. It was a difficult task for... which decent lady would be willing to marry a middle aged guy who already has got 2 wives and both with kids. 3 from the first wife and 2 from the 2nd. If a lady was willing, that lady's nature was not appealing to our lady. After much looking around, she finally came across one with a gentle and innocent heart and very pretty too. She found her in a village about 13 kms from her residence. So, she went and approached this village belle's parents and requested them with all her heart to give their daughter's hand in marriage to her husband. She promised them that she would never treat her as a 'Sautan'(husband's other wife) but rather as a sister and will always take great care of her and would never differentiate between her own children and the children which their daughter would bear after marrying her husband. Only thing she desires is that her husband should stay at home and their household remain a complete one with a father, mothers and their children together and not incomplete as of then with him almost all the time staying at the 2nd wife's residence. The parents of the lady relented realizing the sincerity with which this lady approached them. They also accepted her as the elder daughter of their family.
        Then one fine day, Sanarik brought the young, beautiful and simple minded village girl to their residence and insisted her husband to accept her as his 3rd wife. The guy was dumbfound but the beauty and innocence of this young lady was too much to resist for him and finally gave in to Sanarik's biddings. And just as Sana had hoped for, her husband remained at home most of the time even though he does go to his 2nd wife in between to see to her and their children's needs. She does not mind that much but happy that her husband's attention is diverted to the young and beautiful 3rd wife and besides, he started giving more attention to her too and it is with her that he turns to when he needs someone to listen to him when his irritated 2nd wife fights with him or when he just needs to confide in someone with a cool, calm and understanding mind.

Finally finally, her plan succeeded and the 2nd wife could do nothing except accept the situation and be satisfied with her guy dropping in only once in a while and not stay with her always as she wanted and though is going to be the way. She came to realize how it feels when her man is taken away by another woman and what it feels like when you wait every single moment for your man to come to you. She should have realized initially that if the guy could leave behind his better half and come to you, then he might some day leave you too for another. In this case, Sanarik managed to manipulate the situation by finding the 3rd herself and kept her and her husband close to her before her husband goes for the 3rd himself and God knows what type of a woman that might turn out to be.

True to her words, she treats the simple minded 3rd wife as her own sister and guides her like a guardian angel in all steps of life. The 3rd wife too treats her always with respect as an elder sister. Sanarik cares for the children born by the 3rd wife with utmost care and the children are more attached to Mom Sana than to their biological mother. Together they run their household leading a more smooth life. No doubt their might be small things that crop up in between and life can never be the same as those times when her husband belonged to her alone but things went her way as she desired after many years of heartbreak and pain. Her husband trusted her more and more and ultimately, she reigned in his heart and non could take her place even though his other wives are there.

This I think is indeed a clever and classy way of getting back on the 2nd wife by the 1st wife. Hats off to Mrs. Sanarik Devi.

***Life is tricky at times but it is up to you to handle the situation.*** - DRK 

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